Hell or High Watermelon

21st Amendment Brewery - Hell or High Watermelon – San Francisco, California

This is by far the coolest looking beer can I have ever seen. The cartoonish caricature of the Statue of Liberty sitting on really what looks to be the Golden Gate Bridge, but probably isn’t, is just too cool. So it’s really a shame that this beer actually isn’t very good. In fact, it is pretty terrible. Why they chose to ferment it with watermelon concentrate and then add more watermelon juice afterwards is a mystery to me. I mean…did they really want their beer to taste like (to quote a friend) “A natty with a melted jolly rancher in it.” Probably not. Honestly, the first thing that popped into my head when I took my first sip was, “this tastes like my burning throat after I vomit.” So maybe this brew is just a little too acidic 21st Amendment Brewers…my advice to you is not to try so hard next time and just make a normal beer for your fancy can. Everyone will be happy!

It appears as though 21st Amendment Brewery is really into the artwork that goes on their cans. Check out their website to see for yourself!!

Craft beers in cans is apparently a new market trend. Smaller breweries are discovering that cans are in fact easier to ship, do not get contaminated by sunlight (skunking the beer), AND are more environmentally friendly. So, many places are taking on a the new look and canning up some of their beers instead of bottling them. Don't be afraid of a craft beer in a can! It's not a gimmick! Don't believe people who say beer tastes better out of the bottle. It's not true. Cans taste just as good. Miller Light out of a can will always be Miller Light/crappy. Craft beer out of a can will always be craft beer out of a can/yummy! Next time you are beer shopping go for the craft cans. Not only will you be purchasing new, great, exciting beer, but you will also be saving the environment!!!!

Obviously 21st Amendment has fully embraced the can and is using it as an effective marketing strategy by putting their beers in awesome-looking cans. It would be hard to walk by a beer with an Astronaut Monkey on it called "Bitter American." Just like it was hard to walk by a beer that had a cartoon statue of liberty on it. Hopefully I'll like what the monkey's hiding inside a little more!

Juniper Pale Ale and a taste of Italy

Oopsies. Sorry for my prolonged absence from the blogosphere! I blame.....my dire need to watch recorded DVR shows, trying not to gain weight from V-Day (doesn't even merit me writing out the full name) cookies/candies/baked goods, and embracing my ripe age of 900 years by going to bed early all the time. I will make it up to you by giving you two reviews today!

Rogue - Juniper Pale Ale - Newport, Oregon

Rogue makes some of my favorite beers, so I was excited to try a new variety. As I have mentioned before I usually don’t like many Pale Ales, but this one ended up being okay. My suspicion is that the addition of the Juniper Berries gave the beer that extra flavor shot that maybe took away from the hoppiness of the usual pale ale. The flavor combination was nice, however, the first sip the only thing I could think was, “that hurt my nostrils.” So this beer has some zest you should be ready for. Or if you're sickly with a clogged up nose maybe you will still be able to taste it! Is that why people like strong pale ales and IPAs? Because they can't taste rull grood? I sense an Blogpinion post about that topic in the near future!

La Rossa Birra Moretti – Italy

7.2% alcohol, 92.8% kinda gross. I’m confused as to what type of beer this is, and it tastes like metal. So I probably won’t be getting it again, or trying harder to figure it out.

(Guess that was really just like one post...deal with it, the second one sucked. I'm surprised I even wrote that much about it.)

Until next time, stay thirsty my friends.

Lucky 7 Porter

Evolution Craft Brewing Company - Lucky 7 - Delmar, Delaware

Another dark beer, another good choice! This one says it is brewed with “7 lucky malts” which I am obviously skeptical about because how can malts be lucky?? Are they lucky for everyone? Or just for the brewers of Delmar? If I start my own brewery can I use them and be lucky? Cause I do like the taste of this beer! Seven malts is a lot of malts, but somehow this beer isn’t overwhelmingly malty, just really tasty. It does have a strong, dark, aftertaste so if that’s not your thing stay away from this one. Or if it is your thing then you should TRY IT!

Nut Brown Ale and American Pale Ale

Special dregs of January double post!!! Don’t worry it’s almost February and they’re 29 days of that this year! My old-man brother currently lives in Louisville and brought a few beers home awhile back. I drank them. I thought. I even wrote about one back in September. So here’s what I had to say about the other two.

BBC – Nut Brown Ale and American Pale Ale – Louisville, Kentucky

Nut Brown Ale - Nutty Brown is what you get when you take a sip of this beer. Imagine that. I’ve never been a huge fan of Brown Ale’s in the past because they always seem to leave a strong after taste, but this BBC version was much lighter and went down very smooth. There’s also a nice dark, mocha sort of coffee after taste as well which is more reminiscent of a porter. I’m currently into trying more brown ale’s and I’m happy to add this one to the approved list.

American Pale Ale - The last of the BBC beers from the brother. I suppose this one was saved for last due to the fact that I generally don’t drink many Pale Ale’s. But these BBC beers have surprised me so far, so I went into this one with a positive attitude. I liked the Saison…I liked the Brown Ale…Maybe I’ll like this Pale Ale!!.....I was wrong. I still don’t like Pale Ale’s. I can definitely appreciate a good beer though, even a good Pale Ale, and this one falls into that category. It’s just not my style. But don’t worry I finished it.

Full Circle

New Holland Brewing - Full Circle - Holland, Michigan

Back label: “Pairings: seafood, corn, veggies, and mild white cheeses.” WHAT! Is it just me or is that like the most unappealing list of beer foods you have ever read? “Mmmhh, yes, this is making me sooo hungry, be a darling and get me a mild white cheese.” OR “Goddamnit, why would you give me this beer if you didn’t make CORN for dinner??!” Ridiculous right?

After trying a sip this was said by roommate Sarah, “I can see how it goes with corn.” REALLY? How?? It doesn’t really taste like anything! No but really it literally has no taste. It’s like seltzer water. It’s like white rice. It’s like lettuce. It’s like Natty. It’s like mild cheese! To quote myself “I didn’t even taste the taste!” Interesting. Maybe I should go get some corn.

Toasted Lager

Toasted Lager - Blue Point Brewing Company - Long Island, NY

This beer was recommended to me by my dear friend Laura Derby. I take her opinions about beer pretty seriously, cause…well…cause I’ve seen her drink it. You know what I’m talkin’ about, Derby Derb.

The beer didn’t let me down. Good taste, Derby. I do not know what a “toasted” lager is, if it is even a real thing, but I like what this beer has going on. It is pleasantly light, sweet, and not very hoppy. In fact it is just the right amount of sweet that it makes you want just one more sip. It’s like how you can never just eat one Dorito, or one prepackaged/premade grocery store St. Patrick’s Day sugar cookie with an inch of green frosting and sprinkles on it. The beer leaves you wanting more, so good thing you probably only ordered/bought 12-16 ounces of it. Seriously, pitchers of it would be problematic because I feel like I could gulp this beer down and not take note of my consumption rate.

Perhaps this is the reason Toasted Lager has won the “World Beer Cup Gold Award.” Sounds like a good award, I wonder if they won a golden beer cup chalice trophy. Maybe they should serve this beer in a golden chalice from now on, so everyone can pretend they are in Indiana Jones drinking out of the Holy Grail. It’s that good.

This review got tangential. Just get this beer and like it.

PS - Happy New Year! May 2012 bring you many beer happy experiences.

Shiner Holiday Cheer - Guest Blog!

Holiday guest blog kindly provided by Danielle Bourguet! Thanks Danielle!!!

Spoetzle Shiner Holiday Cheer - Shiner, Texas

Foreword: Not being a literary charmer or word smith, I will attempt to entertain you as a guest blogger with juxtapositions related to the beer of subject and an emulation of the linking style of the author.

After catching up on this blog and avoiding a fairly significant decision, I was inspired to get a six pack after my bar method class this evening. Spoetzl Brewery is based in none other than, “Sveden?” you say, incorrect, Shiner, Texas. “Shiner Holiday Cheer” is the brewery’s seasonal brew. Many of you may have imbibed a beer of the Shiner legacy, with its unassuming label of non-metallic colors, reminiscent 50’s fonts, and English language and moderate price. My last Shiner experience was with their summer ale, which was brewed with ruby red grapefruit and ginger. Bizarre indeed.

I know nothing about Shiner, Texas, and chances are, neither do you, but the label has holly and stars on it. Holly, plus what I’m assuming are sunny and moderate Shiner December days seem unnatural, but let’s go with it. This seasonal is brewed with (unseasonable) peaches and pecans. While peaches are always great in concept, experience has proven them to be expensive and mealy in December, but what the hell. For technical purposes it is characterized as a Bavarian-style dark wheat (nope, no noun after that) on the neck label, an ale on the front label, and an old world dunkelweizen on the back label. Editing fail or conflicting win!

As you can see above, the color is darker than any beer I ever imagine brewed with fruit. It has a fruity peach/apple aroma with only a late hint of malt reminding you that it is indeed a beer, not a party punch served with a soup ladle. The carbonation is less than soda or any other bud-light-type beer i.e. if you drank it quickly your eyes would not water. Upon your first sip you are hit with a light and sweet peach flavor, next reminded that it is indeed a beer with some maltiness, and it finishes with a pleasantly mercurial bitter note. This is a stretch, but I may have earlier tasted some pecan flavor in the aftertaste, but 7/8 of the way through any sensation of that has vanished with the development of an incredible thirst. Assuming its high sugar content brings this on, combined with the heavier fruit flavor, I will conclude that this is one of those beers that people will say, “I can only drink one of them.” That being said, I applaud Spoetzl for not flavoring their holiday seasonal with cinnamon, firewood, reindeer, smoke, coriander, Santa, nutmeg or other cliché things. Peach might be a bit strange, but the beer is too heavy for a summer ale. Personally, I’d have two with a glass of water.

Afterword: Beer in a wine glass is a rarity for me, but I selected it as the only way to follow my empty-the-refrigerator-before-leaving-for-vacation meal of half a can of refried beans topped with cabbage and green enchilada sauce.